Dante: Hey, i heard you’re organizing Kyrie’s bachelorette party.
Lady: Yes, why?
Dante: Do you need a stripper? Since it’s for family, i accept just a pizza as payment.
Lady: … Dante, no.
Trish: … Dante, yes.
Lady: Trish! This would be totally weird! I mean, he’s uncle of the bachelorette’s groom! He’s basically her uncle-in-law!
Trish: Oh, Lady, don’t be such a puritan. He’s just gonna dance naked, no big deal. Also, Kyrie is not complaining.
Kyrie: …
Lady: Kyrie, you can’t be really considering it.
Kyrie: Well, he IS very hot.
—
Dante, what do you mean you were just jocking? now you’re going to drag your ass here and shake it as if your life depent of it.
Jacob: Peaches, take out the dog.
Staci: *Crying as he loads his gun, pressing the muzzle to the dogs head* Y-Yes sir.
Jacob:…For a walk, Pratt
Rook: John if I was a gardener I’d put our tulips together
John: aw
Jacob: Pratt if I was a gardener I’d make you my hoe
Pratt: …..thank you
Jacob: Joseph found me another stray and he’s going to be staying with us from now on.
Peggies: Oh, another wol-That’s a Deputy.
Jacob: I know, ain’t he cute? I’m namin’ ‘im Peaches.
Pratt: Fuck you.
Jacob: Don’t actually pet him though, he bites
